Out of the mouth of babes

As any parent knows there comes a time when your child says something that will

A. Shock you
B. Embarrass you
C. Make you laugh so hard you have to pee
D. All of the above!

As a mother of Toddlers I’ve heard things that no non parent would ever think could be uttered in a normal non drunk off your a$$ situation.
Such as  todays one liner spoken by Lila, our three year old.

Mommy, mommy! I found Ariel’s boobs!  - shouted enthusiastically as any three year old can.

Now to anyone else that would sound absurd and a little disturbing. To a mom it was perfectly Clear she found the seashell top from this toy.

Our most embarrassing moments come in public. Don’t you love how little ones don’t have that little voice that tells them this isn't the moment to shout – Mommy, you farted! (for the record I did not, but thanks to the offending party who cut and ran).

My sisters favorite is when Lila (at 19months old) screamed Cock through out the store while she what shopping for CLOCKS! I love that one, mostly because I wasn’t on the receiving end of that embarrassing moment.

We spent 3 months getting the worst looks in public when Lorelai screamed “Help me” Every Eff’n time we took her shopping. OMG am I glad that stage is over and Peyton never went through it.

My son the other day called me a Hoe. It is hilarious! My father was trying to teach him to say No way, Jose! What I got was No way, Hoe!!

I have tons more but before I share more of my toddler tales I ask you to share a few of yours. In a few weeks I will pick my top favorite entries and post them then you can vote for #1.

So sent them in parents I know you got them, so lets share them!

Aww Cute!

Google is a wonderful thing sometimes. I ran across this really cute teddy and just had to find out more about it. And I thought it would be nice to share a heartwarming story of this famous bear. He goes by the name Tatty Teddy, or is otherwise known as the Me to You Bear.
By the end of his story, I promise you would feel all fuzzy and warm :)
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The oldest, smallest house you can imagine was about to be knocked down. All the things that once made the house nice and cosy had been thrown outside and piled up in the front garden, from the soft springy bed the owners slept in, to the old wooden floorboards they used to walk on…

…and even, surely by some mistake, a little brown teddy bear.

He was trapped amongst all the other unwanted things, and couldn’t move. Then, one day, a very cold day, something fell from the sky… A little snowflake.

It landed on the teddy bear’s little nose and then was followed by many more. He began to get cold, very cold indeed. More and more snow fell, heavier and heavier. The little bear was now so cold that his nose started turning blue… So cold that his brown fur started turning grey.

He was cold, unloved and all alone in the world, and felt very, very sad.

Winter finally passed and the weather got warmer. One beautiful spring day, a little girl was playing near the old house, when she spotted the grey bear in the pile of unwanted things. He was like no other bear she had ever seen and she pulled him out from where he was trapped.

She dusted him down and lifted him high in the sky to look at him.

“A grey teddy bear… With a blue nose?” she thought. “How strange!”

The teddy bear wanted to cry. He thought she didn’t like him and would throw him back with the other unwanted things.

“But he’s lovely!” she continued and she fell completely in love with him.

She ran home as fast as her little legs would carry her, to see if her Grandma could patch him up as a lot of his stuffing had fallen out, and he was very much in need of repair.

She looked on as her Grandma replaced his stuffing and patched up his holes. His stitches had started showing where the fur had worn away, but the little girl thought he looked perfect.

It was all cosy and warm in the little girl’s house and the bear felt all cosy and warm in his heart. However, his nose was still blue and his fur was still grey, and they would never return to brown.

He was unique among teddy bears.

The little girl gave him a great big hug. She loved him more than anything else in the world, her little grey, blue-nosed…

…Tatty Teddy.

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Awww! Tell me, wasn’t that sweet? It made my heart feel all warm and fuzzy. If you want more, here’s a flash version of the Tatty Teddy story in a flippable storybook.