If you have never heard of the Bloggess. I suggest, no demand you stop reading this immediately and go read some of her posts. Like this one, or this one and lastly this one. The last one is what inspired me to write this.
My comment to her soul baring bravery -
I want to hug you, and shout at you, and most of all cry because I fight this battle everyday. I thank you for giving words to the hell I live in daily but I also want curse you because now its out there in words. Your right we hide and are ashamed of something we cant control. I don’t have a support system like you, I wish I did. I look at my toddlers and cant figure out why I’m not happy. What the hell is happy?
To quote her “When depression sufferers fight, recover and go into remission we seldom even know, simply because so many suffer in the dark…ashamed to admit something they see as a personal weakness…afraid that people will worry, and more afraid that they won’t. We find ourselves unable to do anything but cling to the couch and force ourselves to breathe.”
So Today I vow to get of that couch. I may not get far but it’s a start. I do have something to live for not merely survive for, and I promise to remember that, even in the darkest of times.
Now I take up my badge, my silver ribbon, and go forth into the unknown. I will make it out alive, badly bruised and and slightly broken but ALIVE. Take a deep breath and go.